Nice Guy.

Photo Caption: Wade Campbell, of St. Paul, says the dispute with his son's Little League coach over how much the 12-year-old got to play has been blown out of proportion. Campbell admits cursing at the coach but says he never threatened him. (JOHN DOMAN, Pioneer Press)

I know there's been countless stories about crazy parents and youth sports, but I had to bring this up. I'm sure you've read about it, but this one hits a little too close to home. The best part, this guy was in trouble a few years ago for attacking his neighbor with his snow-blower. How is that even possible? And what is the sequence of events, in your mind, which leads to attacking someone with a snow-blower? Amazing. Anyway, here's the story from the Pioneer Press.

Dad charged with threatening Little League coach
BY MARA H. GOTTFRIED
Pioneer Press
Article Last Updated: 06/26/2007 01:01:37 PM CDT

Prosecutors this morning charged the father of a St. Paul Little Leaguer with threatening to shoot his son's coach.

Police arrested Wade Campbell, 46, Sunday after he called the coach and told him "he was going to be shot down like a dog and that they 'f----- with the wrong East Sider," according to a criminal complaint charging Campbell with making terroristic threats.

Campbell, of St. Paul, disputed the allegations Monday during an interview in the Ramsey County jail. He cursed at the coach, Noe Ambriz Jr., but never threatened him, Campbell said. He said he was frustrated his 12-year-old son didn't see more playing time.

The trouble began Friday at a Parkway Little League game in St. Paul's Dayton's Bluff neighborhood.

Campbell was yelling and swearing in the dugout area and had to be asked to leave, the complaint said. Campbell said Monday he only cursed softly at his son.

Campbell's conduct continued in the stand and league officials asked Campbell to leave the field, the complaint said.

On Saturday, Ambriz and his family returned to their St. Paul home from another baseball game, in which Campbell's son hadn't played, the complaint said. Ambriz noticed Campbell was in the yard of a neighbor, who is a friend of Campbell, the complaint said.

Campbell didn't say anything to the Ambrizes, but continuously stared at them, the complaint said. Campbell left the area after about two hours, but called the Ambrizes' home twice and hung up both times, the complaint said.
On Sunday, the Ambrizes saw Campbell pull up in his vehicle behind their house and stop, the complaint said. After a short stay, he left the area, the complaint said. About 20 minutes later, Campbell called the Ambrizes and made the threat about shooting them, the complaint said.

Campbell also said, "I'll be over in five minutes," the complaint said.

A Musical Ear Indeed!!!

This past Friday night my daughter had her very first piano recital. She started getting lessons in January and she picked it up really well, so, there we were at St. Thomas the Crusading Apostle of the Holy Redeemer’s Lady of Faith Church, in St. Paul.

My daughter played lovely and I was a very proud Papa. However, this was not the highlight of the evening. Sitting next to me was an elderly gentleman, I’d say somewhere in his upper 70’s, and he was the type of aged person who is hard of hearing, but he hasn’t quite made the big leap to purchasing a hearing aid. Consequently, he would say things that were only intended for his wife to hear—as she was sitting to his immediate right, but everyone within a 10-13 foot radius could readily understand his ramblings.

For example, when some kid would happily finish their piece he would utter something like, “There’s a great big smile,” or “They just keep getting better.” Pretty harmless stuff. BUT, on one particular occasion, a fairly large girl, about the same age as my first-grade daughter, started walking to the piano to play her musical selection, in a dress that was none too flattering, and the elder statesman blurts out: “OH, she’s a chubby one.”

Awesome. I’m pretty sure that everybody sitting around us heard him, but I am hopeful that the girl did not. I only wish I had looked around to see the reaction of the people sitting around us. Understandably, I was too busy putting my chin down, closing my eyes and trying to hold back the laughter.

Lucky for me, I was able to replay this scenario over, and over, and over, and over as the rest of the children, ages 6-14, exhibited their talents, or lack thereof.

How 'Bout dem Cubbies!!!!

Let's face it sports fans: THE CUBS ARE ON A ROLL!!!!!!
Things have gotten so bad, that rather than taking their frustrations out on the other team, they've resorted to fighting each other!

And in the middle of it all: Sweet, Sweet Lou. You gotta love it.

I had a video of Pinella's press conference, but stupid MLB said we can't show it anymore. So, instead, here's a home-made video of Lou Pinella getting ejected the DAY AFTER the Zambrano/Barrett Battle.

Watch Lou go nuts, but, also, notice the amount of beer cups getting dumped by those crazy bastards in the bleacher seats.

AWWWWWWWWWWWW fugedaboutit!! The MLB Nazis refuse to let anyone show any aspects of their precious product. No wonder Baseball is losing out to Football……Basketball……..Golf…………Badminton…..

Hey, MLB, whatever you do, don’t let your game become more visible/approachable and thus more POPULAR!!!!

FUCKING IDIOTS!!!!


By the way, my brothers, and myself, and a few of our collective friends will be making our annual pilgrimage to Wriggley this August. Sitting in the Bleachers, of course. Stay tuned.

Good times in the Classroom

Thankfully, the school year is almost over. As most of you know, I work at an inner-city school and this year we had some problems with fights in the beginning of the year. Particularly, we had a big brew-ha-ha when parents came up to the school one day and started fighting a couple students in the hallway. However, it was never as bad the video below. It takes place in Milwaukee and it shows a really bad fight in the classroom. Astonishingly, the teacher is nowhere to be found, which the reporter is quick to point out. I did a little research and learned that this fight took place in March of ’07. Lastly, it appears as though this same negligent teacher also failed to report the possession of a hand-gun. KEEP UP THE GOOD WORK, BUDDY!!!!! Enjoy the vid.

Check the Links to play the video.

Not the Best Omen

Yesterday our baseball team opened up the play-offs against some suburban school who is ranked WAAAAAY higher than we are, but that’s the case every year and we usually give a pretty good fight. For example, two years ago we were a 12 seed and we played St. Thomas Academy, the 5 seed. We scored 1 in the 3rd inning, and held on until the 6th when our pitcher beaned the lead-off batter and gave up 2 runs, and we lost 2-1. Four years ago we lost to Woodbury 1-0, when their 2nd basemen made the greatest infield catch in the history of suburban white kids, robbing us of two runs. Last year we played a city school, and choked away a 4 run lead in the 5th when a bird pooped on our Right Fielder’s left eyeball and he dropped a lazy fly-ball. Nobody actually saw the bird, or the poop, but I don’t know how else he could have mishandled such an easy, routine pop-up.

One year later, yesterday, we’re getting ready to leave for Southeast Suburbia to take on the 4th seeded Salacious Subdudes; the bus is loaded up and I’m about to get on it myself when I hear the Head Coach call my name from our outfield. I look over to see him walking with our 9th grade coach who appears to be holding his hand up, as if he’s getting ready to receive communion, with one hand.

Turns out, he’s holding up his left hand because in it is the tip of his left pinky. Somehow he managed to get it lopped off while he was closing the door on our storage shed. Apparently the panels pinched together and removed the entire nail portion of his digit.

Thanks to mass media coverage, we all know what to do when someone loses a portion of his or her leg/arm/foot AND hand: you get some ice and place the detached portion on, or in, said ice. Our slightly lighter coach then drove himself to the Emergency Room and we hopped on the bus.

Once we arrived to the ball park things got progressively worse and we were 10-runned in five innings. South Suburban High only had about 5-6, $400 bats which were apparently more powerful than our sixty-dollar, Sam’s Club Specials. They were also bigger and more athletic than us.

Oh, and our 9th grade coach? They reattached his pinky and they said that it has an 80% chance of taking. Apparently, these odds were a little better than our chance of winning the day’s game.

"I still carry, uhhhh..... a peNIS."

So I'm showing a Globetrekker video, the same series shown on PBS, to my Geography class and the host meets up with a couple of "Ladies" on the busy Istanbul strip. Immediately, it is apparent that these two gals are in fact NOT, and one of them, who goes by the name of Magnolia, explains that he/she has not had any surgery: “I was always a beautiful man, not a hansom one. I still carry, ummmmm a penis?”

I about fell out of my chair and the kids led the way with a chorus of: “ooooooooooh!” One boy, in particular who wasn’t aware of his/her gender, yelled out: “Awww SHIIIIT, Man, she’s a dude?!”

Naturally, the other boys started razzing him, indicting him on charges of loving Turkish transvestites. If only they had used these terms.

Gap Kids......SUCKS

Here's a nice a little video from our good friends at the onion. Enjoy.


Gap Unveils New 'For Kids By Kids' Clothing Line